Monday, April 17, 2017

A beautiful miracle happened to me 11 years ago

April 17, 2006. Just like today, it was the Monday after Easter Sunday and that Monday from 11 years ago means so much to me.
It all started during Lenten Season in 2006. Everything dawn on me. I am so weak. I look very much different from a couple of months before. I am totally deaf. I can’t walk. I can’t chew and swallow properly. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. Etc. It felt like everything and everyone is moving with time and I was already left behind. I was sad. I had a hard time sleeping. It was an anxiety attack. It felt like I was already going to die because of my condition that time. I kept telling myself that’s It’s alright. 22 years (I was 22 years old then) is already enough.

But what really comforted me were all the bible verses and prayers that were posted on the wall beside my bed. I didn’t talk that much and the only One who I talk comfortably with was God. I’m just so used to talking to Him like how I talk with the people who are close to me. Since I don’t need to put much effort talking to Him and I won’t get tired. I don’t need to use any of my weak strength. All I had to do was think. Everything that I think about was passed on to Him so I don’t really keep everything to myself.

Holy Week 2006. I felt worse and worse and worse. I kept saying, “I’m going insane. I’m going insane.” I don’t understand what’s happening to me and to me, it really felt like going insane. That time, I just don’t understand. It was like an Angel versus Devil scenario in my mind. The one that we watch & read. The angel versus the devil. Yes, that was how it was. Crazy, right?


My mom kept reminding me to continue fighting and then placed a small silver crucifix on my hand and I never let go of it. I held it in my hand, in between my palm every time, any time and all the time.


My “I’m going insane. I’m going insane.” chant became “On Sunday. On Sunday.” I was looking forward to Easter Sunday. I was counting the days until Easter Sunday and I don’t know why, I just want it to be Easter Sunday already.

Easter Sunday finally arrived, nothing special happened to me. I still don’t know why I was excited for it to arrive. Still, I was happy. That’s all.

A very very very AMAZING thing happened the next day! I felt so good and while I was having my breakfast, I cheerfully told my mom that we’ll get better! “I will get better! You will get better!” and then my grandma came inside the house and I told her that she will get better too. With full of joy and excitement, I kept on saying “We will all get better!”

After a while, I told my mom, “Life must go on.” that I will give my best in everything. I can still do a lot of things despite my disabilities.

JESUS LIVES
and He brought my dying spirit back to life!



images from google



Tuesday, March 07, 2017

I aM POSSIBLE!

In 2008, I gave myself the best birthday gift from my hard-earned money. I was able to buy

Tuesday, February 14, 2017

February 14 is GALS Day!

Move over Valentine’s Day, today is GALS Day!!!

GALS is Graciano Altre Lopez Sr. He is the husband of Diding (Mang). He is the father of Vic, Jun, Belle, Miriam, Madge, Angie & Jim. He is the grandfather of Miguel Franco, Maria Kathrina, Jonathan Mark, Cristopher Jason, Ana Celina, Mark Anthony, Valerie Ann, Talitha Karisse, Viella Mae, Paul Michael, Paula Therese, Holy Ann, Janna Mariz, Allen David, Juan Mikhail +, Chrissie Ann, Patricia Nicole, Kiefer Jan, Maro Luiz, Jesper Ryan and Atom.

He died on February 14, 2000 due to heart ailment. We call him PAPA or Papa Lolo and everyone else called him Noning.

 Papa Noning is G.A.L.S. and it is not mere acronym of his name for us, but happiness, love and togetherness because that is what he shared and taught when he was still with us.

Almost all of my happy childhood memories were spent with my cousins from the maternal side, and all gratitude I give to our lolo Papa. “Basta bigyan niyo ako ng maraming apo,” those were Papa’s words as he blessed the weddings of all his children.

I remember having many overnight stays with my cousins at my grandparents’ house in Mandaluyong. Good thing our home is just a few blocks away but my cousins who live in Navotas, Muntinlupa, Makati, Pasig, and Cainta were all personally fetched by Papa. How fond of and loving he was to us.

During summer, the whole family traveled to Aloleng in Agno, Pangasinan to stay at our Papa and Mang’s vacation house. We frolicked in the beach, ran around the grassland, climbed up the tree house Papa made for us, picked mangoes and chicos, and made campfires.  Because of these bonding moments, my cousins and I have been like siblings who are really close to each other, up until now.

Papa was a survivor. He faced a lot of accidents, from minor accidents like falling down the ladder, to major ones like a vehicular accident, and serious burns from a fire accident; but he bravely overcame all these and continued on with his life. Now that I think about it, it was through Papa where I witnessed the real meaning of the quote “Life must go on”.



Sunday, February 12, 2017

YOU ARE LOVED

Love is a most potent force.  It does make our world go round.  It puts gladness into hearts, making them skip with joy and excitement.  In most countries around the world, and since time immemorial, a day is specially celebrated for love’s sake.


There are several stories that tell about the origin of Valentine’s Day.

There is one that tells of a Roman citizen who was martyred on February 14 for refusing to give up Christianity and for helping Christians escape the harsh Roman prisons.

Another person named Valentine left a farewell note for the jailer's daughter, who had become his friend, and signed it "From Your Valentine".

There is also a story that tells about St. Valentine, a priest who was jailed for defying Emperor Claudius who outlawed marriage for young men because the Emperor believed that single men made better soldiers that those with sweethearts, wives and families. St. Valentine saw it as an injustice and continued to perform marriages in secrecy.  He was beheaded on February 14, at around 270 AD.

The origins and history of why we celebrate the day of hearts on February 14 may differ; nevertheless, it puts emphasis on a common subject – LOVE.  And celebrating LOVE is precisely what Valentine’s Day is all about.

Giving love and celebrating love on Valentine’s Day is not limited only to the romance between two hearts (romantic love).

Not being in a romantic relationship does not mean one is loveless.

Love is everywhere.  Love is free.  It is a God-given blessing for us to give as well as to receive.

Sunday, December 25, 2016

Christmas Special

The last thing on my “to-do-list” this year was to make Christmas (and New Year) gift tags. Despite the migraine aura, I was able to accomplish it and I was all done in less than an hour that leaves me to do nothing but stare on my computer and surf the net. And then I suddenly had a light bulb moment.


I remembered the video that I saw on Facebook a few days ago. This Christmas, what will you choose? To receive something special or to give something to someone special? And I am choosing both.

I really had nothing worthwhile to do so I also made a gift tag for my friends I would see the name on my notifications. Those who liked or commented on my posts (Even though it’s not a bit related to the Christmas gift tag. Haha.) I also checked my friends list chose to include those familiar names. Yes, I was that bored. I was also determined. I really want to do this. I just want to. A couple of days ago, I have decided that if I want to do something and I can do it by myself, I will definitely push through with it and if it’s something that I need to depend much on other people, I will think about it first.

I wanted to make my friends feel special and this Christmas Project is very simple and with God’s help, I can do this by myself and it was a succes

My Christmas Project may be just mere images and a simple Christmas greetings but it has a lot of things in it. I didn’t use any app or generator for it and every photo that I made came with my effort, my sincerity, my love and my prayers. Of course, prayers are included because as we all know, Jesus is the reason for this season, right?



I feel so fulfilled once again because I have greeted 500+ persons a Merry Christmas and I did it one by one and I hope that I made them feel special in a way.
It was so amazing that I wasn’t a bit tired from doing it, in fact I feel so great because I did it and I was able to do all of it by myself in my own little way.

For the pepeople that I wasn’t able to give a gift tag to, I just wasn’t able to make you one. That’s all. YOU ARE STILL VERY VERY SPECIAL and Jesus was born for YOU.

Let’s make our friends and love ones feel special. It doesn’t need to be something big or something grand. We can do it in our own little and simple ways. Not only this Christmas but always.

 MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU





Monday, November 07, 2016

Scarhead

I was reminded of the word “scarface” and then I giggled and wrote this on my Facebook:


And then my Malaysian friend, YL shared with me something Keisha wrote about dealing with NF2 and surgery scars, this was from her last public speech before she passed away in 2014 and here it is:

"I have a genetic condition called NF2. Basically, tumors grow throughout my nervous system, and every time I have sought treatment, I come out of the operating room with a new scar - a souvenir to remind me of a hard-fought battle for survival.

I do not see reason to consider these scars a disfigurement of my body. Rather, I choose to see them a testament of how trials and adversity can unite the human spirit. Out of tragedy, my family, doctors, nurses, physiotherapists, caregivers and friends have united time and again to shine forth with the ultimate good within humankind. This is the story behind each and every scar on my body - of a unity of care and love turning tragedy into triumph.

In overcoming danger and earning the scars, I have found true strength, true character true faith and true love."

—Keisha Petrus (1989-2014)

Though I wasn’t able to meet Keisha when she was still alive, it's like I already did and I’m so inspired by her. Thanks to YL that I got to read her previous writings.

“My duels with NF2 have left me scarred, wheelchair bound and deaf! As bleak as that sounds, my life doesn’t revolve around the hospital. I have never let NF2 stop me from living my life. To the contrary, I have allowed my condition to provide me opportunities to broaden my horizons, challenge my faith and test my character. So instead of wallowing in self-pity, I embrace adversity to bring out the best in me and overcome the obstacles in my life. Thanks to my condition, I’ve been able to experience the world in a way few people get to see. The fragility of life inspires me to live to the fullest."
— Keisha Petrus (1989-2014)

It’s so amazing that we have the same outlook in life. WOW. WOW. WOW.



While I was about to write this blog post, YL commented on the status that I posted in Facebook with Keisha’s peice. 

Maybe, God eavesdropped on what I was thinking again and HE learned about the topic I’m planning to write & asked Keisha to whisper to YL for him to share that certain writing / speech that she wrote back in April 2014 that I posted above.

I also love this poem written by Keisha:

I Am Wearin' My Skin
Poem by Keisha Petrus

My message stands tall with pride and grace, 
My words in good time shall be like wind, 
Brace yourself dear friend, let the breeze propel you, 
Trust in my mission, and you will be free to live life’s embrace.

I once was swayed by aesthetic charm, 
Beautiful hair, beautiful eyes, beautiful body, 
I sweat, I sought, I fought, 
To no avail did I reach my Envy.

Lost a few pounds, strapped on my heels, 
No more laughter, no more tears.
But my heart knew better, I lacked content, 
I yearned, I cried, I prayed for something more than this.

My pleas were answered, my life put in perspective, 
Those blossoming belles bore nothing, 
Instead engrossed in hopeless insecurity, indeed highly defective, 
A hidden image behind a mirror, a roamer’s reflection.

Loving myself is more important than ridding my blemishes, 
As women come in many shapes and sizes.
I spend my time now in helping others, 
I am wearin’ my skin, no more empty and foolish disguises.

Tuesday, October 25, 2016

Today should be my 11th birthday. Haha

October 25, 2005 — it’s my Tita Myrna’s (aunt & godmother) birthday. I was supposed to went upstairs and use the computer to send her an email and greet her a happy birthday but then I suddenly felt very dizzy (servere vertigo) and I can't climb the stairs Vertigo + Severe headache = I passed out and became unconscious..... then DOT DOT DOT


I was brought to and admitted at Philippine General Hospital. Thant was the start of my 2-month long hospital stay when my health deteriorated and became weaker and weaker. 11 years ago. Everyone thought I won’t be able to survive. Everyone, including the doctors and nurses. About to die, maybe? It’s so amazing that from being bedridden and very weak, I feel so great and stronger.



I may still be in this condition with a lot of limitations, but still. No need to explain further, instead I’ll let my life explain it to you..everyday..as long as the clock is ticking.

Monday, October 17, 2016

KCAT CAN eBook? Yes

Wanna read this book on your reading devices or your computer? YOU CAN!
You can buy KCAT CAN: I have a pen that writes in eBook (.PDF) format for $10 and pay via PayPal.

PayPal email: kcatyarza@yahoo.com

ORDER HERE

You can also send an email to me@kcatyarza.com

Let’s inspire each other!

Tuesday, September 06, 2016

I dunno what title to put, it's just so amazing!

Last Friday, while I was waiting to be prayed over by Fr. Joey Faller after the healing mass, something suddenly pop out of my mind that made me say, “Thank you, thank you so very much, Lord.” I kept on thanking God until it was already my turn & Fr. Joey placed his hand over my head.

Back in late 2005, when I was confined in the hospital for 2 month and my health deteriorated. Most of you knows that I became so weak then. Very very weak. It was really hard to move on my own. Even when I want to roll on the bed and change my sleeping position, someone has to do it for me.

I would often close my eyes and imagine myself getting better and I suddenly what I kept telling God back then. “Please heal me. Please. Please. Please. If You do, I promise to pay You back by sharing your words through my own words.

***TEARS OF JOY***

 I was discharged from the hospital but even if I am already home, I still kept pleading to God especially when I had an anxiety attack in Holy Week 2006.

And then last Friday, I just realized that God has been answering me since the day after Holy Week 2006.  

I keep on stopping while writing this because it’s just so amazing! I feel like crying and thanks again, Lord for not letting me cry coz I might hyperventilate. I even don’t feel like there’s a lump on my throat. Thank you, thank you Lord.

And wait, there’s more!

During a conversation with someone, I got to remember this…


 AMAZING! AMAZING! AMAZING! I don’t know what else to say. It is really so amazing!!!


And now, God made my words to Him when I was lying in the hospital bed in 2005 become a reality. ANG GALING GALING TALAGA!

Sunday, July 24, 2016

It's bcoz... WHY NOT?!

Why am I so strong? Why am I so brave? Why am I still a happy & cheerful person despite the not so good things that's happening in my life? Why am I so confident about myself? Why am I able to laugh at myself? Why am I full of positivity? Why do I find it easy to move on with my life?

Why? Why? Why?

Ever since whenever (even before I was diagnosed with NF2 in 2004), I often encounter these questions and people would complement how brave and strong I am and that I have a very a positive outlook towards life.

While smiling, I would alwaya answer: “Ganon talaga.” Or “Why not?” Haha.

Now I realize that my Faith has been working since then. Faith in myself, Faith in others and of course, Faith in GOD.

And now I totally get it, this is the reason why I have a very big and very strong FAITH today. Wow. Wow. Wow. Thank you Lord!


• I am strong because God is the strongest.

• I am brave because God is at my back, in front of me, my left-side and right-side, above me and below me. He is all over me, protecting me.

• I always feel so good because God is so great. He is the greatest!

• I am able to face these challenges because I am not doing it alone. I am surrounded with awesome people and of course, an awesome God.

• I am always ready because God already prepared me before I was born.

• I am a fighter because God is with me in all of my battles.

• I am a cheerful person because God is always making me happy!

• Amazing things are happening in my life because an amazing God is doing it.

Indeed. EVERYTHING HAS A REASON.
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