Deafness Chikahan

silence..
scary isn't it? not being able to hear whatever.. but it isn't that bad after all..

i've been deaf since january.. but i fell like it even before pa.. when my hearing was already deteriorating.. actually, left ko nalang nakakarinig noon coz my right ear is not responding (according to the hearing test) na.. i even had a hearing aid on my left ear, ang sarap pala makarinig! hehe. but suddenly, i became totally deaf.. i used to say "pag di ko narinig, eh di wag!" so whatever i hear, yun na yon.. that was nung may naririnig pa kong konti.. eh now, wala na talaga.. so, what? hehe.

i already accepted the fact that i can't be able to hear anymore.. there came a time when i was really crying coz i really really really wanna hear.. i was thinking that it could only be a dream, when i wake up, i'll be able to hear again.. but i didn't! i was still deaf..

a lot of sleepless nights.. and worst thoughts came across me.. until i admitted it to to myself.. i can't hear anymore.. sad but true.. as always, i told myself: "tanggap ko!" galing noh? ewan ko ba, basta that's how i feel eh.. talagang ok lang.. as in OK! haha.

there are times nga na bigla ko nlng mare-realize, i'm deaf pala.. nyeh! nakikipagkwentuhan ako.. as if i can hear their stories.. how's that? lip reading. thank God i can read lips.. and i'm kinda good at it.. medyo sanay na.. if that's my way of communicating, then be it!

i always bring home a story to share whenever i go out.. where else will i go? eh di sa hospital.. hehe. basta, whatever i've done, i share it with my friends.. i'm still that super daldal like always.. haha. i can talk naman kaya i'm talking.. though nakakapagod lang.. so, i stop din naman.. hehe. stop na din ako dito.. tinatamad na ko eh.. haha.

I’m not gonna sleep pa pala.. so I’ll blog some more.. i forgot to write some things pa eh.. haba na nga nito eh.. hehe.

newei, there are advantages naman of not being able to hear.. i could be able to think more.. time to reflect.. walang istorbo na ingay eh.. just silence.. kaya nga madalas, i'm thinking about stuff lang.. whatever it is.. mga bagay-bagay.. there are times when we cover our ears when we don't wanna hear what we don't want to.. ako, i don't need to cover my ears anymore kasi i won't be able to hear it talaga.. haha.

o sha! i'm gonna log-off na talaga.. til here..